When our days are filled with so many stressors and stimuli, especially from the screens in our pockets, it often feels like everyone is short on time and patience, no matter how old you are. It can be hard to fully and genuinely engage with one another. 

As a Harvard-trained EQ researcher and mom of three, I understand from both my professional experience and personal struggles how tough it can be to raise emotionally intelligent kids right now, especially when our attention spans are so divided. 

With that in mind, six years ago, I created a side hustle selling card games on Amazon to help people build "human skills" like emotional intelligence and critical thinking in a fun, accessible way. 

It's so important to me to share what I've learned about how to best support the needs of our kids and ourselves. Here are three phrases I say to my kids to help them become more emotionally intelligent

1. "How would you describe this feeling?"

When kids throw tantrums, it's often because they lack the language and skills to express themselves. It is up to us to help them develop their emotional literacy to better understand and manage their feelings. 

A child might say they're "sad" when they're really feeling lonely, embarrassed, or misunderstood. By equipping kids with more specific words like "frustrated," "disappointed," or "nervous," we empower them to recognize and articulate their emotions.

Parents can weave emotional vocabularies into their daily routine to bolster children's self-awareness and social awareness in a few different ways:

• While listening or singing to a song, describe the feelings the song evokes in you.
• When watching a TV show together, chat about the possible emotions a character might feel — and how you would feel in the same situation.
• Toward the end of the day, have a conversation about the emotions experienced that day.

The biggest misstep I observe is when parents label emotions as "good" or "bad." Instead of seeming to judge a feeling, parents should focus on helping their kids understand what the feeling reveals about their values and needs. 

2. "I'm not at my best today, and that's okay"

As parents, we can often feel pressured to maintain our composure and hide our emotions, but this can set an unrealistic standard for our kids. Ironically, the more we suppress our emotions, the greater the likelihood that comments or behaviors may provoke a yelling outburst.

We must model healthy emotional expression by sharing our feelings in ways our children can understand. This doesn't mean overwhelming them with our problems, but rather showing that it's normal to feel a range of emotions and to discuss them openly.

For example, if we snap because we're overwhelmed, instead of hiding our guilt and pretending nothing happened, we can use it as a teachable moment for working through a difficult emotion. Be honest about your "grumpy pants," and model the six steps to a good apology.

When we openly work through our own emotions, we demonstrate to our kids that it's normal to have strong emotions — and how important it is to talk about our actions and make amends.

3. "Your emotions are real and valid"

We must tend to our children's feelings by co-regulating with them. Avoid downplaying their emotional scrapes with dismissive phrases like, "Suck it up," or "It's not a big deal." To a child, feelings are very real and can be all-consuming.

In all my workshops, I emphasize the importance of first acknowledging emotional experiences and then role-modeling emotional expressions. This reminds kids that while they can't always control what happens to them, they have the power to manage how they respond to painful and anxiety-inducing situations.

In my research and creating my card game, 52 Essential Coping Skills for Kids, I've found that emotionally intelligent and resilient kids exhibit a wider range of creative coping strategies. Here are three coping exercises I always recommend, to help both kids, and adults, manage difficult situations:

• Cool down clouds. Take a slow, deep breath through your nose. Imagine gathering up all your unpleasant feelings. Exhale and picture yourself blowing away those emotions as dark clouds. Think: "Inhale calm, exhale storm."
• Giggle transformation. When you cringe again thinking about that embarrassing thing you did, level up by adding silly details. Transform it into a big absurd story, and have a good laugh at this new, goofy version.
• Om-Hum: Did you know humming can help calm your mind and body? Pick your favorite song and hum along. Feel the vibrations spread across your body, and the stress start to melt away. 

Dr. Jenny Woo is a Harvard-trained educator, EQ researcher, and founder/CEO of Mind Brain Emotion. She created a series of educational card games and mental health tools to help kids and adults develop human skills in the age of AI. Her award-winning card games, the 52 Essential Relationship Skills, 52 Essential Social Skills, and 52 Essential Life Skills are used in 50+ countries. Follow her on LinkedIn, YouTube, and Instagram,

Want to make extra money outside of your day job? Sign up for CNBC's new online course How to Earn Passive Income Online to learn about common passive income streams, tips to get started and real-life success stories.

Plus, sign up for CNBC Make It's newsletter to get tips and tricks for success at work, with money and in life.